I did a post yesterday in my Facebook group, about how I feel like I have “lost” myself.
These were some of the pictures I came across that got me emotional and kind of sad. The person in these pictures was a go-getter. She would push herself and find any and every opportunity to accomplish some goal or find some race that would make her work harder and accomplish things she never thought she could.
Ironically, that was WHILE she was dealing with the mold exposure but didn’t “know” it yet. Funny huh? She was able to push and do all those things while being sick, but once she discovered she was “sick” she became sick and unmotivated.
I think our minds can sometimes be our worst battle! They tell us one thing when we know in our hearts it’s something else. Even our bodies are so ready to push forward but it’s our minds that hold us back.
Well that is where I have been for about the last year. Stuck in this crappy mindset. Somewhere in the back of my mind, I keep hearing, “don’t over do it, you will go back to being sick and feeling like you did before”, even though I know in my heart that is the farthest thing from the truth. I am really struggling with shutting that negative talk off and it is really pissing me off. It’s so hard to explain, that even my husband thinks I am crazy! Well, even more so than normal. 😉
So I have been doing some journaling, trying to figure out how to get past it all. How to deal with the anger and frustrations that over take me when I want to push myself harder and do certain things. I also asked my acupuncturist if we could do some emotional work the next time I am in and see if I can work through these feelings and get past them.
I really do want “me” back again. 😒
The second part of this is my hormones. They have been a wreck since being exposed to the mold and we have been working on them for years. Not to mention I am in my mid 40’s when things normally tend to go wonky anyhow.
Progesterone is a hormone in the body that stimulates and regulates various functions. It’s produced in the ovaries, the placenta (when you get pregnant) and the adrenal glands. It helps prepare your body for pregnancy and conception, regulates your menstrual cycle and impacts your libido.
- Irregular Cycles: Cycles are irregular, longer than usual, or your luteal phase is shorter than normal.
- Menstrual Issues: PCOS (Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome), mid-cycle spotting, severe menstrual cramps.
- Infertility: Difficulty conceiving, miscarriages. Progesterone is one of the primary hormones involved in maintaining a healthy pregnancy. Low levels can lead to infertility issues.
- Energy and Sex Drive Issues: Low libido, foggy thinking, and fatigue.
- Emotional Issues: Depression, mood swings and anxiety.
- Skin Issues: Acne, cracked and dry skin, brittle nails.
- Slower Metabolism: Weight gain, particularly in your midsection, and sugar cravings.
- Other Medical Issues: Allergy symptoms, migraines, joint pains and headaches.
That explained a LOT of what I had been dealing with the past few months!
We also found that my Dopamine levels were low…
What is Dopamine?
Dopamine is a molecule that our body produces naturally, and it’s the substance that’s behind our dreams and biggest secrets. Dopamine means lust, love, infidelity, motivation, attention, femininity, learning, and addiction.
Dopamine is like a chemical messenger in the brain, which is technically known as a neurotransmitter, and is responsible for sending signals from the central nervous system. It is what allows information to be passed from one neuron to another.
Dopamine’s effects on the brain depends on a few different factors and is influenced by the other types of neurons that its combined with. Scientists originally thought that this substance was related to real pleasure, pleasure that we’ve experienced. However, it’s recently been argues that dopamine is more related to anticipatory pleasure and motivation.
Symptoms of low Dopamine:
- Inability to handle stress
- Mood swings
- Inability to concentrate
- Failure to finish tasks
- Low sex drive
- Gastrointestinal disturbance
So now it all made sense. This was part of where my lack of drive, push and motivation was coming from.
Don’t get me wrong, I know I still need to work on my mindset around being “sick” but having both of these things low, at least makes me feel like I am not totally crazy! 😵
This is why I have felt like sleeping all day, every day, and I was not sleeping at all at night, I had no motivation to do anything or push myself in my workouts or in my business for that matter and why I felt like my mind was spiraling out of control day after day with 100 million thoughts! And I was unable to drop any body fat or weight no matter how clean I ate and how much I worked out.
What’s the next step??
Well I started on some Progesterone cream about 2 weeks ago and ever since I now fall asleep within minutes and if I wake up I can fall back to sleep. I have also added a supplement to boost my dopamine as well. I NEED to start doing some more “self care” such as meditation, keep up with the journaling and stopping to take a break once in a while from work and life.
Because I am a business owner, my stress levels are so pretty high, so I need to learn ways to counteract that stress to give my adrenals and my mind a rest.
So there you have it..
I am glad to have answers and know what I need to do. Now its a matter of making it all happen.
I am so ready to get back to being “ME” again.. and I KNOW it’s coming soon.